Minivan Memories 2022

 Third Seat

Time ambushes us in ordinary moments.

I cleaned the Mazda minivan 

today at Zips Car Wash,

even though it was August hot and  ad just rained.

I had time.

It was 4 pm which I used to call the witching hour 

because our kids tended to come apart at the seams about then.

The vacuuming and scrubbing part

morphed into a hour as I folded and unfolded rows 

digging out wrappers and straws,

scouring sticky doors,

and murky cup holders.

I sucked up at a dozen

sundry fruit pits.

It was satisfying work to make it all clean.

Until I opened a the forgotten compartment

in the third row--

A time capsule containing

a Wendy's cup, 

an unopened bag of Goldfish,

and a tiny Lego man.

Which child forgot their treasures

and grew up in the meanwhile?

How many miles and years rolled by?

Trips to the pool, co-ops, and store...

Then lisences, college, and Covid.

The middle of life blurs by

much like the landscapes we pass

always racing to the next next.

For a moment, I sat in the back of the van 

crying and wondering.

Do I throw out the Lego man?

Silly perhaps, but it felt cruel to me

after all that patient waiting.

How many more miles will pass again

until that compartment

gets used---if ever?

And where did the little boy and girls go

with their insatiable appetites 

for fruit and play?

Christmas 2022

 

December 16, 2022

Well, we are back to a live Christmas tree this year after last year’s artifical one. The family was nostalgic to resume our tree cutting tradition, so back we went the day after Thanksgiving to wander the hills of Sandy Hollar Farm. The afternoon was temperate and overcast--romantically broody weather for the Sandy Mush Valley, one of the loveliest spots I know. Incidentally, I’ve decided that each type of Christmas tree has its charms. I’ve grown fond of the “some of both” approach to life which seems to bring both variety and peace.

This year has been full of resuming vaguely familiar pre-Covid rhythms--broader travel, more relaxed vacations, bigger gatherings, fewer masks. In some regards, the last several years brought a good dose of change to our family even before Covid. Briggs and I have become accustomed to the flux and flow of young adult children who are here and there, in and out, now you see them now you don’t. We’re learning to hold family coordination more lightly--delighted when they appear at the door but discovering our own new adventures when they don’t. 

Briggs and I are enjoying more time for each other, more time to read, linger, talk, and wonder. Out of necessity, you acclimate to “parent think” for so many years that it gradually becomes the default. And I think it’s mostly good--parenting grows you as a person and as a couple. But all the while, these little people are simultaneously busy becoming themselves--sometimes quietly, sometimes loudly, but ever persistently.  So much of life seems to be a dance of such identities--growing and gaining, losing and releasing. Just when the movements become natural, the music shifts, and we all learn a new dance. This spring will usher in another such shift. In late April, Grace will have her white coat ceremony which marks the transition from her classroom to clinical OT studies. In May, Rose will graduate from high school and David from college.  April and May will be busy months of celebration here!

Grace (23)  continues to enjoy her time in Charleston. She’s excited to solidify some of her upcoming fieldwork locations and has laid the foundation for her capstone project which will begin next fall. This December she’s participating in a school trip to Trinidad to work in their local community PT/OT clinic. Admittedly less exotic but meaningful in a different way, Grace and I traveled up to Buffalo, NY this August.  I grew up in Buffalo and loved sharing some of my memories and genealogical research work with Grace. We toured the Old First Ward Irish section of Buffalo, took a boat tour up the old Buffalo River where the grain elevators loaded ships, ate fantastic local food, and spent some low-key time catching up with my sister Linda.

David (20) is winding up or down his senior year at Appalachian State, studying finance. In May he studied abroad in Angers, France with the school’s business program. They visited Paris, Normandy, and an insanely ambitious garden I long to see someday. He tried to bring me a packet of seeds home but customs decided otherwise. After getting in one night, he woke the next morning and stepped into the currents of wave-after-wave of summer camp counseling. He’s enthusiastic about his faith, loves being in community, and working with young people. Also, this spring he was chosen to be a part of their business school’s Bowden Investment Group which manages a university investment fund among other things. One of the lesser requirements of his involvement is that he wear a suit to class which cramps his longboarding lifestyle and renders him a campus curiosity. Because David can be a low-key type of guy and a minimalist with regard to extra work, it’s been fun to watch all of this grow out of him and his choices. 

Rose (18) is most thankful to leave her Covid--and soon high school--years behind her. I don’t envy these teenagers whose lives were also characterized by change before Covid. Covid was change-on-top-of-change for them. First she longed to work, but we waited because of Covid. Then she went through a series of jobs until she found her sweet spot--working as a barista at the Barnes & Noble Starbucks. After earning her CNA this summer and pondering a future in nursing, she woke one morning and told us she’s decided to pursue Economics instead. We’re thankful for all of these evolving thoughts--they mark forward progress. This semester, she hunkered down and stuck out a brutal Chem II class. And she triumphed! We are most happy for her--not about any grades--but about the lessons and character that grow from seeing through the tough and sometimes unfair aspects of life. This April, the three of us spent five days in New York City for her spring break. I was surprised by how much we all enjoyed the trip and the city--full of classic NYC bucket list items, a broadway show, and some history as well. 

Briggs continues to head up a thriving business--this year he’s reached the highest level in the Edward Jones model. He’s worked hard to understand the market and all aspects of finances so that he can better help his clients.  All this said, it’s also been a draining year as a financial advisor at the helm of people’s portfolios and life plans. Although he can’t change the market, he’s done a lot of listening and been a steady guide through the financial whirlwinds. As the saying goes, “Everyone is a genius in a bull market.”  I’m thankful for all the ways he is able to use his gifts to help others in hugely meaningful ways. When we started this Edward Jones adventure ten years ago, it was crazy stressful, but looking back it’s been a privilege to watch it all grow. Lest you think he’s all work, Briggs has also been busy learning Spanish, following Clemson football, taking long cold hikes with our goofy dogs, and pulling wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow of ivy from our yard. Grace and Briggs share a rapt fascination with intense weeding; I suspect it’s a form of therapy for both.

With our youngest graduating from high school, will I graduate from homeschooling this year as well? I suppose technically, yes. I’ve taken the last year off from classroom teaching in the homeschool community, but I’m still involved in academic testing and some private tutoring. I’m enjoying the different rhythms and diminished paperwork, and I imagine I’ll continue to work with  young people in whatever ways and shapes arise and fit a healthy work-family balance. As I move further into my 50’s, my hope is to strike a better balance among the many things I like to pursue--some teaching, some learning. Along these lines, last January I began piano lessons, an instrument I’ve always longed to play. It’s a slow process with many lessons ahead, but even my small achievements and gradual progress has been very rewarding. It’s  fun, growing, and humbling to tackle a new skill as an adult.

We hope each of you is well.  We look forward to the hope of connecting more although we realize we continue to be in a race between good intentions and the fury of time. “Don’t blink” as they say. So, we wish you time enough--even though it is never enough---time with family and friends, time to rest, time to wonder as we enjoy the holiday lull and look with hope toward 2023.

God rest ye merry,

Elizabeth, Briggs, Grace, David & Rose

What is it with the holidays?

 Holidays are one thing for a child and quite another for adults. For children, holidays are full of breaks from school, gatherings, decorations, wishes, and surprises.  As an adult, I experience some of those things too, but they are muted, tempered by the weight of my hand in making it all happen.

For me, holidays are full of longing and laboring to make everyone have a happy holiday.  If I shared this perspective with my family, I imagine some of them would not understand it or think it was me overcomplicating things. The gap in understanding can cause conflict and strain. They don't understand what I do.  They think it just happens a certain way rather effortlessly.

And honestly, after working through so many layers of what my childhood was and was not, what my parents were and were not, what my husband is and is not, what my in-laws are and are not, I really can't say whether this is me complicating things, or a manifestation of a type of codependency, or part of being a mom.  What do I want for Christmas? Each of my family members to experience a merry Christmas.  I really think this is what I want most of all.  All the rest of whatever happens or doesn't happen, lists and requests, food and events, flows from this overarching hope.

I also know that holidays for me are full of thinking about gifts intensely--what is arriving, not arriving, what color, size, kind?  Where do I put it all?  Do I have what I need to wrap it? Am I spending too much? Not enough? What can I get that is clever, different, not the same old thing? What does my family NEED.  What will they wear or use? David thinks this is an unimaginative approach to gift gifting.  But, he speaks from the romantic headspace of a 20 year-old young man who has never had a wife or child. I would love to be romantic about the holidays--such a perspect is a gift too that is long past my age, role, and stage in life.

My husband is largely oblivious of everyone's wishes and needs.  It's not that he doesn't care--because he does. His mind just doesn't process the holidays or people in the same way mind does.  He loves and experiences differently. Thus the gifts are much more an extension of my thoughts and experiences than his. All the same, this means that I do most, if not all, of the holiday thinking whether good or bad, necessary or overkill, enough or too much.  If I try to involve him in all these details and gymjnastics, then I end up frustrated explaining my thinking or thinking over his thinking which is just MORE dang thinking in the end.

We can blame Charles Dickens or Washington Irving for this Christmas commercial build-up mess that is Christmas these days.  We can poo-poo that it's much less about celebrating Christ and much more about us and our idealized precontrived expectations.  We can drum up ways to scale back, give back, refocus, reprioritize, but in the end, there are still gifts under a tree that somehow need to happen.

Sometimes all of this spills out into gusts of emotions--mine, my children's my husband's.  Sometimes it's the perfect awful storm. This build up of holiday expectations and preparations--the gifts, the relationships, the weight placed on a handful of days at the end of the year when light is scarce and the New Year is pressing at our door.  It all becomes too too much, like that ginormous bucket of water towering over a water park--filling to the brim then there's nothing to do but brace myself for the weight of the deluge.

If I could take or leave what I appreciate about the holidays. Here's what I would take and keep. I love cooking good food for people, wrapping presents with care, the cheer of our Christmas lights and snowman family that pierce the darkness of cold and dreary winter days.  I would hang up string after string of bright white lights and remember the year that I never did make that happen for my acutely sick father for his final Christmas with us here.

I would keep the mulled cider, the hot chocolate with marshmallows, the Hershy kisses, the dancing candles, the breathing coals of a mature fire, the delicate unexpected snowfalls that soften the dirt edges of life for a moment.  The clean bright slate of such snow.

I would keep the Christmas morning gathering in our family room---one of the few times in the year when all of us sit down for an extended period of time, look at each other, and appreciate the value in being together, giving things to each other that we hope each will like or delight in. 

I would leave the over-purchases that just happen along the way, the mismatched gift expectations, the trips to stores that do not have what I need or want, the traffic, the cognitive dissonance that comes when I try to find my place in the visible church, the fatigue of cooking so many dishes at once in a home that doesn't have a good layout for a communal kitchen, the tiny-let down that comes when all the gifts are unwrapped, we have eaten good food, and ask "what next?"

In the end, my holiday experience seems bound by the truth that I am a very practical person that wants others to be happy.  Everything else comes out of this for better or worse.   

Ten Things

Here are ten things I've been thinking about in 2014:

1. As children get older, they become more themselves.  As my aunt once said "you won't be able to shape your children as much as you'd like."  Each child has a natural bend in personality and inclination.  Parents can shape the bend, but we have to work with the inherent form.

2. Raising older children is as challenging as raising younger children.  Somehow I thought there would be a break in there.  Yes, I can grocery shop these days without incident, but our children require more emotionally and spiritually than ever.  The dialogues become trickier, the situations more complex.

3. Our public lives are over-valued and our private lives under-rated. 

4.  God answers our prayers in a number of ways--however, His preference is not typically for the  dramatic or immediate.

5. Educators, in all areas of their work, are under-valued and under-paid.  

6. People are exhausting.  I could be a happy hermit under different circumstances.

7.  I understand now why older women typically prefer not to cook except for special occasions.

8.  I have a love-hate relationship with Facebook, which I am not sure is a reflection of a problem in me or a problem in other people, or a problem in all of us.  I am thankful for the occasional glimpses into the life of others, but dislike the endless pre-generated inspirational quotes, campy news stories, and "being proud of" every accomplishment in their child's life.  It all smacks of narcissism at times. 

9. The end of a matter is usually more complicated than its beginning.

10.  People don't take the time to read much of anything carefully these days.

Ornaments and Death

It seems we are always trying to remember someone or something, to freeze time. We do this in different ways. Sometimes we put prayer cards in our wallets for decades. Sometimes we hang a dog collar on our Christmas tree. Sometimes we let our minds linger despite the hurt.

Grace named Cookie.  I wanted to name her Saluda because that's where she came from.  I recall piling three young kids in our van one day, a spontaneous whim, "Let's go see these puppies, but no promises." In a double-wide in Saluda, we met her parents, Daisy and Spud. Who leaves without a puppy?

We thought we wanted a boy, but the boy was uninspiring. Instead, out of a pack of girl puppies, one with a clean white stripe up her forehead wiggled out and laid her chin on my knee. Done.

I  think horoscopes are stupid, but I definitely believe in the providence of God.

Grace is right and better than me with words.  The last week she was a Pac-Man ghost who followed the borders of our rooms mindlessly each night. Twitching and jerking.  Clearly lost. Excruciating painful. Time to go.

Our family mascot. Jealous. Loyal. Joker-faced lover of our family.

25 Years...

Remembering our wedding day 25 years later--a day of ominous miscommunications and missteps. A suburban "Yankee" from Buffalo, NY with three sisters marrying what his father introduced to me as "a red-blooded American boy" from rural North Carolina with two brothers. Two distinct cultures and families coming together with little idea of the depth of those differences.  My father offered to "chauffeur" us from the church to the reception and Briggs jumped in the front seat, leaving me alone in the back. 😄 When we got home that evening, I burst into tears, an emotional decompression that completely bewildered both of us. Certainly, we did most everything the hard way. It's been an uphill climb into a greater awareness of what love is and isn't. Some love, like the love for children, comes instantly and effortlessly, but other loves take time and pressure to forge. Even though we didn't marry especially young (25 and 28), we indeed "grew up together." I count every obstacle our strength now, and I am a better person for his sharpening---iron sharpens iron indeed. Twenty five years in---no offense to Briggs--but all glory to God for the shaping, refining, and growth. I am so thankful that the Lord had better plans for us than we had for ourselves.  The verses I picked for our ceremony have held up: 

Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
 two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. 
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Christmas 2018

December 21, 2018

Dear Family and Friends,

I hope this letter finds you well, and I trust that it will find you after Christmas, which is ooo-kay. These letters never fall out of the sky for me, but I believe there’s value in the process of reflection and the effort to connect a bit more deeply with friends and family. When I asked if Briggs would like to write the Christmas letter again, in keeping with his fair and agreeable nature, he replied, “What do you think about rotating every other year?” So, although I enjoyed my reprieve, and he did a super job, for this year we are back to my 4 pages instead of his 2. You can read every other line if you like. ; )

Thankfully, it’s been a lovely year to reflect upon---we’ve had no big transitions or jarring events. The months have slipped by. When I was younger, I loved the different and surprising, but lately I prefer the common and everyday. Grant me time enough to read, weed the garden, teach a concept well, cook a favorite dish, talk books, hang out on the deck and talk…. These ordinary events bring me the most satisfaction and steady joy. Big events are nice...big events are fun...but it’s the small and quiet that sustains me.

Briggs had a very productive year in his work, his best yet. The longer he does financial advising, the more I see the value and impact of his work. It makes me happy to watch him thriving and growing as he works diligently at a job he genuinely loves. Who else looks at dense statistical charts in the wee hours of the morning for kicks? Some people never find their passion; others do but are unable to support themselves in it. We’re grateful Briggs is able to do both.

His successful year also resulted in a long-awaited “reward trip” (part of Edward Jones’ compensation philosophy). We’ve been watching his fellow advisers earn such trips for years (some after much hard work like Briggs, but others just because they happened to “inherit” a profitable office). Because of this discrepancy, it’s been hard to listen to others chat about their trips, then go back home and sit on our flaking and cat-scratched chairs. I’m being painfully honest here, and I realize my thoughts sounds awful, but I share them to be real and to provide some context. Some families vacation far and wide frequently, but for our family, this trip was well-deserved and extraordinary. It gave our family a chance to celebrate and appreciate the years Briggs has labored to lay the foundation of his business.

So, in late July, we spent a week in the Berner Oberland region of Switzerland, exactly 20 years to the month after Briggs and I first discovered this area “pre-children” in 1998. It was dear and wonderful to return to such a breath-taking area, a homecoming of sorts. I count us blessed to see it once, but the Lord gave us twice---and even more, He gave us the chance to share that experience with our teenage children.

I wondered if Switzerland would hold up to our memories--it easily surpassed them. For one,this trip was certainly more relaxing than our past. We arrived knowing much more, with 20 more years of marriage and life under our belts. I think we are making progress. On our first trip, Briggs and I spent much of the trip learning how to get along as a young married couple. This trip we moved on to teaching our children how to get along! Though some things in the town of Interlaken had definitely changed (it’s now full of paragliders and a medley of international tourists), the surrounding mountains were the same---timeless, crazy majestic. Switzerland remains my kind of country--clean, safe, environmentally conscious, up front, and on time.

What did our three teenagers make of it? Grace and Rose haven’t flown in many years, and they quickly revised their romantics dreams of airports and airplanes to “not happy places.” Next they marveled at the ease and efficiency of European public transportation. We were all impressed with the gracious accommodations of our historic hotel (quite a step up from our prior youth hostels and pensions). They were even more impressed by the ridiculously picturesque mountains, lakes, and valleys of the region. Our day-to-day experiences sparked many thoughtful discussions about how to work together as a team, about Swiss culture, but also about the differences in Asian, Middle Eastern, and Indian cultures as well. We were regularly surrounded by an international mix of voices and ways. I love the way travel broadens the lens through which we see others and ourselves.

Some lighter moments---Both David and Rose regularly ate the plainest and most Americanized fare possible. Ingrates! One evening to our shame, they left an entire pot of Swiss fondue practically untouched. In the end, they discovered an easier love for Swiss bread and chocolates, and we concluded that teenagers are teenagers wherever they may go. Our teens were also plagued by jet lag. Inherently sleep-driven creatures anyway, they napped on some of the most beautiful benches and hillsides of Switzerland. So be it. We find our “magical parenting powers” to be increasingly limited these days. Our motto has necessarily become “pick and choose, conserve and reserve.” Time and adulthood will catch up with them soon enough.

Moving back to domestic life, I’ll mention that we’ve adopted a ketogenic-based food philosophy for over a year now. When we first began, we were considered oddities, but the approach is trendier and trendier these days. Briggs jokes that it’s the only time we’ve ever been ahead of a nutritional trend. Both of us have dropped weight and have increased energy levels because of it. We sleep better, wake up earlier, don’t think about food as often, and can go without eating much longer. My blood pressure and pulse rate are both lower, and I have not had an episode of pseudo-gout (something that cropped up in the fall 2017), since. Bizarrely, my feet have dropped a full size. For Briggs, he loves the energy increase and his A1C has improved greatly.

Beyond this, truthfully, I dislike “talking keto” because it opens a troublesome door. So this is my best effort. First, let me just suggest that our culture is bat crazy about nutritional and health trends. There is such a glut of contrasting information and such strong and varied opinions that it drains me to enter that bloody arena. I sometimes find myself battered by other people’s opinions about food choices, dietary approaches, the evils of fat, their untouchable love of sweets, concerns about the sustainability and wisdom of the approach--all this plus the occasionally intrusive and slightly condescending comments about my weight loss specifically. Yikes, who welcomes that?

Briggs does. ; ) So, if you are curious to learn more, he’s your guy. He loves to talk keto endlessly. Me, I’d rather do what works quietly and move on with other aspects of life. I’m not trying to start a movement or judge those who think differently. In fact, it would be easier not to mention it at all, but I bother for these reasons: 1) It’s been part of our year and a shift in approach 2) I know many who are looking for a weight control method that is sustainable 3) I feel that some people, especially the naturally “trim,” fail to grasp the emotional or physical complexities of weight loss and the reality of regain statistics. Food and weight issues cannot be reduced to a lack of nutritional education or sufficient self-control. These are complex issues, and we all struggle in our own ways--some more and some less visible.

Gladly moving on, I’ve continued to stay busy in the field of homeschool education (yet another area where people have many preconceptions and opinions!) Professionally, I continue to administer the Woodcock Johnson test to homeschoolers and to teach classes in our homeschool community. I’ve doubled my course load from last year and currently teach 4 classes with 3 preps--Junior High Language Arts, High School British Literature, and AP Language and Composition. The workload has been manageable, and I love working with students, but the first semester has been busier than I prefer. I’m hoping things will relax a bit next school year, and I’m planning for fewer new preps.

The other bulk of my work is continuing to guide our three teenages through academic and life challenges. Briggs is instrumental in this work as well, especially as the children age up. He is a level-headed patient man, great at guiding and buffering, especially when I get worn thin from the drama. And while I don’t take for granted the freedom I have these days, I sometimes wish back the now seemingly simple years of younger family life. The work we do now feels less cheerful, less quantifiable, and sometimes requires revisiting uncomfortable parts of our younger selves. It means guiding our teens through an increasingly wide and broken world, while we peer into the fog alongside them, without tidy answers. Why do some people think that because children get bigger they require less intentional parenting? Honestly, I often feel the reverse.

Grace (19) is scurrying her way through her college years at Chapel Hill as a Human Development and Family Life Studies major. Yes, there are lots of new majors these days! Her long-term goal is Occupational Therapy school, and this path provides a solid foundation that she’ll use in her future work. Her coursework is a mix of education, psychology, and social work. She’s also developed a passion to help the Spanish-speaking community and hopes a minor in Spanish will broaden her abilities. This past summer she had a fantastic paid internship at a local adult-day program in Asheville. During her time there, she discovered that she loves working with the elderly, and she developed an amazingly mature perspective toward aging and declining abilities.

David (16) has grown a lot the last year…yes, by height (he’s 6’ 2” now), but even more in his ability to manage adult-like responsibilities. School wise, as he’s a high school junior, we decided to launch him into the NC “dual enrollment” program. This semester, he’s had 4 classes at our local community college and will have 3 more next. He’s adapted well, enjoying the rhythm and independence. At this point, he basically runs his own schedule---AB Tech during the week, Five Guys and Youth Group on the weekends, and a girlfriend. He does electrical for GLITCH, a FIRST robotics club (FRC), which will gear up for their high season in the new year.

Still a young man of few words, but solid thought, Dave thinks cleanly and clearly about most matters. He’s low impact, except for his dishes and penchant for too much fast food. I’m sure this coming year will bring more growth as he enters his senior year and sifts through college choices. He may even finish his Eagle rank, but if he does, it will be his choice and his work, not ours. David is increasingly intrigued with the thought of pursuing business/finance as a future major (which excites Briggs), though we are open to whatever and wherever he feels led. I mean that. We mean that. We want our kids to live out their plans and hopes, not our own.

Rose (14) wishes not to be mentioned. “Don’t put down anything about me” was her quick response to my question about highlights from her year. She’s in the thick of those early “I wish I could disappear because you are so embarrassing” years. All three of our children have a strong sense of self---who they are and who they are not. Out of the three though, Rose’s sense of self has been the most different than my own. I bite my nails; she endlessly paints hers. I treasure books; when we stop by the library, she asks if she can “just stay in the car.” I prefer character driven movies; she loves Marvel and Youtube. I’m a “get it and go” shopper; she’s a “let’s look around at all the options” shopper. I work hard for low drama; she works hard for high, peppering us all with clips of animals being rescued from disasters, sharing the details of our cat’s latest “kill,” reporting back the status of the camel crickets traps in our basement: “Look mom, there are four in there now, but one is only half stuck...” My father’s words sometimes echo in my ears “You know, I don’t need to know everything!” Then there is the perpetual pain of Latin class. While her older sister has given an oral presentation on all the reasons to study Latin, I’m confident that Rose could give an equally excellent one on all the reasons to not. Such is the difference in our children!

I could go on...we enjoyed my sister Kathy’s visit this summer from Boston and appreciated the time to catch up. Our vegetable garden was just okay this year--I always felt a step behind. We’ve got a crabgrass issue in our back yard that threatens my efforts to gain the upper hand. I did manage to plant several beds of asparagus and another Granny Smith apple tree. My flower beds were more encouraging--Queen Lime Orange Zinnias and Procut Sunflowers were my stars. I love the life that a garden brings in all senses, the insects, the birds, the smell of dirt, and the struggle for life. Our family enjoyed our annual North Carolina beach week in May and the annual Edward Jones regional meeting in Hilton Head in June. In November, we suddenly had to replace the main plumbing line to our home, cha-ching! Our basement is a mess and continues to periodically flood due to drainage issues. This coming year, I’m looking forward to my 50th birthday and our 25th anniversary---time keeps coming at us, that’s for sure.

Despite feeling awkward about mentioning matters of faith, I feel compelled to all the same. Lately, I have been thinking about this passage from the apostle Paul:

“I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. Let all who are spiritually mature agree on these things. If you disagree on some point, I believe God will make it plain to you. But we must hold on to the progress we have already made.” -Philippians 3:12-15

Paul’s hopes mirror my own. We are not perfect, but each works in progress. We press on. We sharpen our focus. We look to what lies ahead with great hope--all of this we do despite living in the often messy “now” because the now is not all. We look forward more than back. I particularly love Paul’s winsome, “If you disagree on some point, I believe God will make it plain to you” because I believe this too. God is faithful to show us what we need, to fill in the gaps, if we ask.

Wishing you and yours all the best as we look toward the new year. May we all press on.

Love,

Elizabeth, Briggs, Grace, David & Rose