Christmas 2022

 

December 16, 2022

Well, we are back to a live Christmas tree this year after last year’s artifical one. The family was nostalgic to resume our tree cutting tradition, so back we went the day after Thanksgiving to wander the hills of Sandy Hollar Farm. The afternoon was temperate and overcast--romantically broody weather for the Sandy Mush Valley, one of the loveliest spots I know. Incidentally, I’ve decided that each type of Christmas tree has its charms. I’ve grown fond of the “some of both” approach to life which seems to bring both variety and peace.

This year has been full of resuming vaguely familiar pre-Covid rhythms--broader travel, more relaxed vacations, bigger gatherings, fewer masks. In some regards, the last several years brought a good dose of change to our family even before Covid. Briggs and I have become accustomed to the flux and flow of young adult children who are here and there, in and out, now you see them now you don’t. We’re learning to hold family coordination more lightly--delighted when they appear at the door but discovering our own new adventures when they don’t. 

Briggs and I are enjoying more time for each other, more time to read, linger, talk, and wonder. Out of necessity, you acclimate to “parent think” for so many years that it gradually becomes the default. And I think it’s mostly good--parenting grows you as a person and as a couple. But all the while, these little people are simultaneously busy becoming themselves--sometimes quietly, sometimes loudly, but ever persistently.  So much of life seems to be a dance of such identities--growing and gaining, losing and releasing. Just when the movements become natural, the music shifts, and we all learn a new dance. This spring will usher in another such shift. In late April, Grace will have her white coat ceremony which marks the transition from her classroom to clinical OT studies. In May, Rose will graduate from high school and David from college.  April and May will be busy months of celebration here!

Grace (23)  continues to enjoy her time in Charleston. She’s excited to solidify some of her upcoming fieldwork locations and has laid the foundation for her capstone project which will begin next fall. This December she’s participating in a school trip to Trinidad to work in their local community PT/OT clinic. Admittedly less exotic but meaningful in a different way, Grace and I traveled up to Buffalo, NY this August.  I grew up in Buffalo and loved sharing some of my memories and genealogical research work with Grace. We toured the Old First Ward Irish section of Buffalo, took a boat tour up the old Buffalo River where the grain elevators loaded ships, ate fantastic local food, and spent some low-key time catching up with my sister Linda.

David (20) is winding up or down his senior year at Appalachian State, studying finance. In May he studied abroad in Angers, France with the school’s business program. They visited Paris, Normandy, and an insanely ambitious garden I long to see someday. He tried to bring me a packet of seeds home but customs decided otherwise. After getting in one night, he woke the next morning and stepped into the currents of wave-after-wave of summer camp counseling. He’s enthusiastic about his faith, loves being in community, and working with young people. Also, this spring he was chosen to be a part of their business school’s Bowden Investment Group which manages a university investment fund among other things. One of the lesser requirements of his involvement is that he wear a suit to class which cramps his longboarding lifestyle and renders him a campus curiosity. Because David can be a low-key type of guy and a minimalist with regard to extra work, it’s been fun to watch all of this grow out of him and his choices. 

Rose (18) is most thankful to leave her Covid--and soon high school--years behind her. I don’t envy these teenagers whose lives were also characterized by change before Covid. Covid was change-on-top-of-change for them. First she longed to work, but we waited because of Covid. Then she went through a series of jobs until she found her sweet spot--working as a barista at the Barnes & Noble Starbucks. After earning her CNA this summer and pondering a future in nursing, she woke one morning and told us she’s decided to pursue Economics instead. We’re thankful for all of these evolving thoughts--they mark forward progress. This semester, she hunkered down and stuck out a brutal Chem II class. And she triumphed! We are most happy for her--not about any grades--but about the lessons and character that grow from seeing through the tough and sometimes unfair aspects of life. This April, the three of us spent five days in New York City for her spring break. I was surprised by how much we all enjoyed the trip and the city--full of classic NYC bucket list items, a broadway show, and some history as well. 

Briggs continues to head up a thriving business--this year he’s reached the highest level in the Edward Jones model. He’s worked hard to understand the market and all aspects of finances so that he can better help his clients.  All this said, it’s also been a draining year as a financial advisor at the helm of people’s portfolios and life plans. Although he can’t change the market, he’s done a lot of listening and been a steady guide through the financial whirlwinds. As the saying goes, “Everyone is a genius in a bull market.”  I’m thankful for all the ways he is able to use his gifts to help others in hugely meaningful ways. When we started this Edward Jones adventure ten years ago, it was crazy stressful, but looking back it’s been a privilege to watch it all grow. Lest you think he’s all work, Briggs has also been busy learning Spanish, following Clemson football, taking long cold hikes with our goofy dogs, and pulling wheelbarrow after wheelbarrow of ivy from our yard. Grace and Briggs share a rapt fascination with intense weeding; I suspect it’s a form of therapy for both.

With our youngest graduating from high school, will I graduate from homeschooling this year as well? I suppose technically, yes. I’ve taken the last year off from classroom teaching in the homeschool community, but I’m still involved in academic testing and some private tutoring. I’m enjoying the different rhythms and diminished paperwork, and I imagine I’ll continue to work with  young people in whatever ways and shapes arise and fit a healthy work-family balance. As I move further into my 50’s, my hope is to strike a better balance among the many things I like to pursue--some teaching, some learning. Along these lines, last January I began piano lessons, an instrument I’ve always longed to play. It’s a slow process with many lessons ahead, but even my small achievements and gradual progress has been very rewarding. It’s  fun, growing, and humbling to tackle a new skill as an adult.

We hope each of you is well.  We look forward to the hope of connecting more although we realize we continue to be in a race between good intentions and the fury of time. “Don’t blink” as they say. So, we wish you time enough--even though it is never enough---time with family and friends, time to rest, time to wonder as we enjoy the holiday lull and look with hope toward 2023.

God rest ye merry,

Elizabeth, Briggs, Grace, David & Rose